


Capture the Flag

by Missy



Category: Big Bang Theory
Genre: Competition, F/M, Gaming, Humor, Romance, Video & Computer Games
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-17
Updated: 2012-08-17
Packaged: 2017-11-12 08:54:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/489058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Missy/pseuds/Missy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Amy, Penny and Bernadette team up to battle Sheldon, Raj and Leonard when Sheldon challenges Amy to a competitive game of Halo.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Capture the Flag

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Measured](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Measured/gifts).



> thank you to afullmargin for beta! Hope you enjoy, Measured; this turned out a tad more gen than I anticipated. I hope you don't mind - there's definitely as much cute Shamy in it as I could manage!

Sunlight glinted off the wire rims of Amy Farrah Fowler’s spectacles as she entered the game store, a jingle of bells at her sensibly-shod heels. She had no need to ask directions or ask the tattoo-speckled clerks for help, even though she hadn’t touched a video game cartridge since she’d declared Tetris ‘painfully pedestrian’ as a six-year-old. She simply followed the fol-de-rol down to the back of the store, where a small cluster of teenagers, twentysomethings and clerks had gathered around a demo display plastered to the back wall of the shop.

At their very heart sat the object of her affection and the center of her amour, Sheldon Cooper (DOCTOR, she should never forget that appellation), who was lustily pummeling the buttons of his Wii controller while flailing his upper arm wildly. She was careful to give him a wide berth – accidents tended to happen when Sheldon was impassionedly involved in sporting competitions. 

And for him this was a sport. 

She waited for him to complete his game before approaching politely. “Hello, Sheldon.”

He inclined his head in her direction and replaced the controller on its plastic stand. “Amy,” he said, “what in the names of Bushnell and Dabney are you doing in a video game shop?”

“I’m pursuing frivolity,” she declared, scanning the rows of games set before her on pegs and boards. “Bernadette has a case of the doldrums and at the bestie’s suggestion we’re going to teach her how to play something engrossing.”

“She does need to take her mind off of Howard for the next few months,” Sheldon admitted. “One of the boys in Comparative Studies told me she spent her entire lunch break shaping her mashed potatoes into a Howard-shaped lump.”

“A true pity.”

“Yes. Doctor Fowler, I am a rather offended that you didn’t request my help beforehand.”

“I was unaware that you had any true expertise in video games that don’t require elfish avatars in large copper breast plates to play them.”

He gasped. “Amy, I formally request you take back that insult.”

“It’s the truth,” she said, her tone somewhat playful in spite of his outrage. “Perhaps you should deal with it.”

“I will do no such thing.” He stiffened his posture and said, rather dramatically, “I would like to formally issue a request for a duel.”

She smirked up at him. “I’m afraid I cannot honor such a patently absurd request, for I have neither pugilistic tendencies nor any formal combat training.”

“I’m not speaking of a pugilistic experience. I seek to redress our argument on a digital battleground.” 

“Very well then,” Amy said, attempting to maintain her confidence. “Challenger’s choice. Select one of the games upon which to make our battle and I shall comply with your wish.”

Sheldon’s fingers skimmed along the plastic-encased video game packages, pulling out the latest version of Halo. “You have two full weeks to match my mastery at the lowest level of this game.”

Amy tucked her hands against her hips. “Challenge accepted. I suppose our pasta date is off?”

He glared at her. “Oh, it’s on, Doctor Fowler. It’s on!” 

“Very well! But I’ll be making macaroni and cheese!”

He gasped. “You she-devil!” With that, Sheldon turned on his heel and beat a path toward the door.

Amy frowned at Sheldon’s retreating back. “You forget one important fact,” she declared. “Penny is a master of the art of Massively Mutiplayer Online Gaming. I don’t recall Leonard displaying any such skill. I’ll simply have to convince Penny to join our little team…”

*** 

“…Honey, nothing on earth could make me dip my toes onto that server.” 

Amy winced and pushed her slice of cheesecake about on her platter; the fourth she’d eaten to keep Penny’s supervisor from kicking her out of the Cheesecake Factory while they talked.

“Perhaps I should sweeten the pot,” she said, leaning in. “I’m attempting to get a rise out of Sheldon.”

Penny’s mouth dropped open. “I don’t think you need me.” 

Amy shook her head. “I’m afraid that isn’t possible. Sheldon’s wager requires us to compete as a team.”

A sluggish, uncomfortable pause passed between them. “Honey, I like Sheldon, but there’s no way I could even, like…kiss him.”

Amy cringed. “Bestie, romantic congress isn’t in the plan. I speak simply of wanting to conquer his flag.”

Penny’s features crinkled into a mask of confusion. “All right, so you need me to show him who’s boss. While playing videogames. ONLY video games.” She grinned. “This should be fun…please tell me you didn’t volunteer Bernadette.”

“I’m afraid she’s also part of the package. Raj will be Sheldon’s third.” She held up a carefully-pressed napkin. “We outlined our plans over octopus spaghetti last night.”

“Yeah.” Penny raised an eyebrow. “Well…”

“Did I mention that he doesn’t believe I can master simple repetitive motor skills?” Penny’s stare was broken by a groan. She rubbed her forehead. “He believes that I have less dexterity than your average zygote…”

“I’ve got no idea what that is.” 

“Sheldon believes I’m dumber than a sea monkey.”

“THAT JERK!” Penny cried out. “I guess if you really need my help…and I’ve got nothing to do on Saturday – I can help you play your little game.”

Amy smiled. “Good! I shall meet your at your apartment to prepare for battle on the great mechanical fields of Halo.”

“I don’t think I know if I can…” Penny began.

“You did promise, bestie.” Amy promptly added, getting up to leave. She took ten bucks out of her purse and smiled. “I’ll make it worth your while,” she added, grinning and winking.

Penny stared at the crisp bill, tugging each end to test its authenticity. “Five more and I’ll do it.”

The deal was struck that simply and quickly.

*** 

When Amy entered the apartment on their designated practice day, Bernadette already waited for them. She sat hunched over the computer with Penny beside her, ‘pew pew’-ing under her breath and occasionally depressing her spacebar.

“I’ve brought the requisite gaming aperitifs,” Amy said, holding up a large bag of Cheetos and a six-pack of Mountain Dew. 

Penny eyed the treats. “If you can’t find me in an hour,” she said, “check the ceiling and peel me off.”

“There isn’t that much caffeine in it is there?” Bernadette asked.

“You’ll need it, honey,” Penny said. “Amy, come here and sit next to me – I’ll teach you the basics.”

Amy rushed over to join Penny while Bernadette got up to poke at the various foodstuffs. Penny quickly showed her the correct button sequences, sending her off on a demo run. 

“Are you having fun?” Penny asked dryly. 

“It reminds me of an experiment I did in college. It was a course in rodent husbandry. If the subject pressed the correct button, he or she would get a sugarcube.”

“What would happen if they pressed the wrong button?”

“They’d get a chlorophyll gumball,” Amy explained, then shrugged at Penny’s expression.

“Bernie,” Penny said, “we’re gonna have to wean you off of these cheat codes. The boys would freak if they knew we were using them.”

“Oh, that’s all right – as long as we get to whip their hinnies off.” She took her place beside Amy and picked up her keyboard.

“Bernadette,” Amy smiled, “I have to commend you for your dedication to the sport. I didn’t think you would be at all interested in humiliating the fellas.”

“Well, I never did like Leonard’s whistling. And Sheldon gave us a blender for our wedding gift. A **blender** ,” she said, leaning with excitement into the keyboard. Suddenly two of the soldiers they had been performing a practice co-op mission with were on the ground.

“Honey?” Penny asked.

“How many smoothies can I make in a year?!” she wondered, as a pile of rusted cars exploded onscreen.

“I think she’s having a hard time dealing with Howard being gone,” Penny stage-whispered to Amy.

“Yes, Bernadette does seem a trifle bit upset,” Amy said, quite logically. “As you would be, if your spouse were circling Earth’s atmosphere.”

*** 

The battle took place the following Friday, with the boys sitting in the kitchen and the girls occupying the sofa in the boys’ apartment. Midway through the battle, Amy glanced up to assess the situation. She’d managed to capture four flags, Penny twelve, and Bernadette one – she remained far too interested in fragging and teabagging the boys to act like a proper teammate. It was sheer luck that she managed to take out Raj’s player with a grenade – Leonard avenged his friend with a blast to Bernadette’s, and then it was just Amy, Sheldon, Leonard and Penny - though Bernadette was having a dramatically-pitched battle with the wall as she stuffed handfuls of Cheetohs into her mouth. 

“I’m going Earhart,” Penny said. “Cover me!”

That was a codeword they’d worked out before the game – it meant she was about to engage her rocket boosters. Amy trudged along behind Penny as she mashed buttons; the slightest flash of metal caught her eyes just as Penny lifted off.

“AMBUSH!” Amy called, frantically firing in every direction as Penny floated away. There was an audible thunk, and she crept in its direction – it came from behind the rusty hulk of a car. 

“Sheldon?” she deduced.

A sudden heavy return fire, followed by a loud ‘Bazinga!’ was her answer.

Amy dodged, using the bulk of the car for protection. Aiming and firing in rapid bursts, she held her ground, taking only minor damage, outlasting Sheldon’s endurance by using the stockpile of health packs she’d saved.

But the sight of his avatar lying there affected her – even though she knew it wasn’t real. “Oh no, Sheldon!” She rushed over to attend to him. “You’re wounded.”

“You shot me six times in the head. What did you expect to happen?” Sheldon wondered.

“I didn’t expect this much blood! I only meant to wing you.”

“Well, it’s far too late for that now, isn’t it? And great, now I’m starting to fade out. Simply superb.”

“Sheldon, are you attempting to foster guilt within me?”

“Is it working?”

“I remain firm in my homicidal instincts and yet curious about your passionate declinations.” 

“Amy, you must have overlooked the simple fact that if you gave me a health pack, I might be able to regenerate myself and continue with the game.”

“…And I happen to have one health pack left...”

“Yes, that’s the exact principal. So would you please give me one of your health packs? For me? Your Shelly-bear?”

Amy remained in a kneeling position, listening to Penny and Leonard argue as they battled it out in the skies above them. “So the choice lies between getting up and having a hearty dinner…or waiting for you to fire upon me until I die?”

“Yes. Which is your choice?”

“I made macaroni and cheese with hot dog octopuses.” 

“…You truly have become quite the vixen, Amy,” Sheldon declared, two seconds before Leonard’s avatar exploded in a shower of sparks and the girls won the game.

*** 

Two hours later, Bernadette had retreated to her apartment with her webcam, Leonard and Penny had retreated to Leonard’s bedroom for voluble make-up sex, and Sheldon and Amy occupied the couch in her apartment, watching Star Trek.

“You are,” he declared, watching her in the flickering blue-white light of the screen, “as wily as Lieutenant Uhura.”

“I beg to disagree with that assessment. Uhura is one of the most brilliant officers in the history of the Enterprise. I simply know how to correctly press the y and x buttons in rapid succession.” 

Her smile was quite serene. Sheldon shook his head at his girlfriend, dipping his hand into the great wall of Redenbacher lying between them. “Amy Farrah-Fowler,” he sighed. “You are quite the enigma. What shall I ever do with you?”

Amy tucked her head onto his shoulder, meeting his hand in the bowl. “Date me?”

“Yes,” Sheldon said, awkwardly slipping his hand into hers. “I suppose I could continue doing that.”

And Amy glowed under Sheldon’s praise.

\- **THE END**


End file.
